Musings from a Pharisee

Where, in the areas of my life, is God asking me to get out of the boat and walk on the water to Him? Where do I need to just go forward in reckless abandon, keeping my eyes completely focused on Jesus?

Why is that I can confess God’s love easily, but find it miserably difficult to absorb into my inner soul and being?

These questions are what I am faced with this morning. I want so much to trust in, feel, and live out the Jesus Creed in reckless abandon, but I know I am falling far short. I find it extremely difficult to love my brothers and sisters in Christ at times, and I John tells me that loving my fellow believers is the mark of a true child of God. Why is loving other people so hard at times? Why do I find it hard to tolerate them? Why do I just want to tell them off or roll my eyes or believe that my way is the best way? Where do those rotten attitudes and unloving thoughts, feelings, and actions come from?

Today I have a lot more questions than answers. I know that I live out the Jesus Creed, answers will come and I will experience:

Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is One. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength. The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than theses.

Mark 12:29b – 31